You've Got Mail!... FINALLY

Today, in overcast Virginia, it's raining cats and dogs-- and mail! Evidently, those yahoos at the post office decided I could get some of my mail now.

Wouldn't you know it, I still didn't get that cloth diaper package. :-P

A Sad Tale of Incompetence

1. Before we left Oklahoma, we did the change-of-address thing.
2. At the end of March, I won a few giveaways and ordered some cloth diaper supplies.
3. I gave my new address in Virginia for all said items.
4. We moved to Virginia. And I waited.
5. And waited.
6. And waited.
7. I haunted the leasing office, where packages are dropped off, for two weeks.
8. In that time, we got ONE piece of mail. Period. No bills, sales flyers, or anything.
9. On Thursday, after watching me come in and out for two weeks, the landlady finally decided to let me in on a secret: UPS leaves packages, but the USPS doesn't. I would have to go to the post office itself.
10. Since it was 4:40 P.M., I jumped in the car and raced down to the post office.
11. I dashed in and breathlessly asked the woman working if I had a package. She wanted to know if I had one of those brown "Delivery Attempted" notes. I told her I never received one. She said something snippy and disappeared into the back for a few minutes.
12. She came back empty-handed and said something to the effect of, "It's probably in limbo because forwarding things takes a while, you dolt." Never mind that I told her repeatedly that these packages were addressed to our NEW address.
13. Yesterday morning, I called the merchant I ordered the diaper stuff from. She gave me a package tracking number. Evidently, the USPS attempted one delivery on the 5th, and my package had been sitting in the post office ever since.

The new uniform of the USPS

14. Armed with this new-found knowledge, I called the post office. I got to hold for a while as the employee searched for the package. Not finding it, she then referred me to the Delivery Manager.
15. I tell him the situation. He says he'll search for it and call me back.
16. I wait.
17. And wait.
18. An hour and a half later, I call him. He informs me that he was waiting till the end of the day so he could talk to the person that delivers my route. Would it have killed him to communicate that, instead of leaving me hanging??

You wouldn't like me when I'm out of laundry.

19. At the end of the day, he calls me with the answer. Are you ready for it?

20. They have been forwarding our already forwarded mail to the people who previously lived at our new address.

21. Yes, you read that right.
22. And here's the kicker:

23. That diaper package? It got forwarded that very morning.


24. Which means it was totally there when that rude employee "searched" for it.
25. So let me get this straight: they attempt ONE delivery, don't leave a notice where I can find it, don't try to follow up with the second or final notice, and then let it sit around for two weeks--in a place that can't be found when someone halfheartedly tries to find it.
26. And this is just one package. I'm not even talking about all the bills and other goodies we've been missing.
27. Meanwhile, some random stranger is getting all our mail.

28. (BANGS HEAD ON WALL REPEATEDLY).


29. There, I feel better.
30. The Delivery Manager said the package "might" come back in a few days. That's scary.
31. Meanwhile, I am stuck using primitive methods to deal with Oscar's transition diapers because my flushable diaper liners never arrived.
32. Yeah! I totally started Oscar on solids! I'm hoping to write about it soon.

33. I think the most annoying part is that I can't take my business elsewhere. No matter how badly they blunder, I'm forced to do business with them anyways. What's a girl to do?

34. Blog about it, duh.

35. And maybe try to revive the alternative delivery industry...

Carrier Pigeons Express:
more reliable than those OTHER bird-brains. 

Why I Hate Apple Products

Last week, when my desktop died of unnatural and mysterious causes, I dug my old iBook out of hiding and tried unsuccessfully to fix that, too. The summer of 2009, my iBook told me, "You won't be the boss of me! Ha!" and deleted my administrator account. I said, "I don't need you anyway! So there!" and let it collect dust on a shelf somewhere. So we were begrudging acquaintances at best when I finally decided to take it to the Apple store this Monday. And I dreaded it.

Gandhi once said, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians." I feel exactly the same way about Apple-- good product, but man, do lots of Mac users annoy the heck out of me. My experience with the Apple "Geniuses" (lol) leads me to believe that they are about two iPod upgrades away from greeting me with, "We are the CHOSEN ones, b****!"

Really? Since when did some people decided they could get all hoity-toity over a piece of plastic with a screen? I used to watch coworkers prostrate themselves before the newest employee to own an iPhone, and I just don't get it. It's a PHONE, and a phone that seems to compel people to endlessly tap on it while you're trying to hold a conversation with them, at that. I think iPhones are great tools, but a phone is a phone is a phone.

I guess the thing that bothers me the most about Apple products is the false sense of elitism it gives its owners. People, Apple products are not exclusive or uncommon or special. Your neighbor owns one. Your mom owns one. That guy who doctors photos of Obama and send them as forwards owns one. Poor college kids without a penny to their name own one, as does every high school kid who likes music. If everyone came to the realization that Apple products are common tools and not fashion accessories, the world would become a happier and much less snooty place.

So go buy that iPood or whatever the heck it is and start impressing people with your ability to use a credit card. You will recognize me as the girl plugging away unconcernedly on her six-year-old VINTAGE computer (yes, that is what the Apple store gods Geniuses called it) and actually talking on her phone.


I am a fairly satisfied Apple user, and I have an internet connection. Therefore, I am qualified to pontificate about this. I know several people personally who do not let their ownership of Apple products get to their head, and it is wonderful-- if that is you, congratulations! The rest of you had better watch out, because I'm laughing at you.